Beautiful cover art

Two things I most dream about when I think of my dream of becoming an author are interviews and cover art. I know that many new authors don't get a say in what kind of cover art their books receive but I would like to think that if I am ever successful I will one day have enough money to hire an artist I admire to do the cover I envisioned.

Last night even, I was dreaming about the cover for HoL, and how the scene I am writing at the moment (where Rana allows Angelique to be taken to prison in order to hide his own shame) would be the one placed on the cover, Rana's anguished face and Angelique's fiery anger at this injustice would be the mirror of their characters in the book. I can see it so clearly in my mind all the scenes of my book that I would probably hate any film/tv version of it every made (haha here comes the snob) unless I was given the command. I paint every scene so delicately, you see, I couldn't bear to have it any other way.

Anyway here are some beautiful Barbara Cartland book covers which I really love (not just because I am a connoisseur of the Japanese manga trade):

http://todaysinspiration.blogspot.com/2009/09/francis-marshall-lessons-in-love.html

The Peri

I finally found something to call my winged beings, Peri. I will only ever use it in the singular sense however as Peris... looks too much like well, y'know *eyebrow raised*. They come from Persia mythology which fits in with my stealing names from all sorts of mythology (the Celtic Fomorii and Norse almost everything). The Peri are beautiful fairy like beings and are supposed to have to regain entrance to paradise through penance. Very intresting :D.

Attempt to show my stance

Smart Bitches, a romance novel blog I frequently visit recently asked after "twilight" and the popularisation of Vampires as romantic objects, what next? will it be werewolves? Fairies? or Angels? Here I had a minor inconvience.

Right now in my books I am writing about human beings with wings. As said in a previous post, I am not trying to show these beings as "angels" being a Christian myself I find it rather awkward (to write about a romantic story, when I believe these things exist, would be like going up to a friend and saying I had written a story about me getting off with them and I wanted them to read it XD) however I can't say that angelic "art" and the mythology of sort of "guardian angels" hasn't influence my writing. Therefore I sought to name my "angelic" characters after something that is winged but not an angel (up to now with no other name I had called them Seraphim, but then I felt weird about that) and came across this point:

Practically every which way we turn today, we are confronted with pictures, small and sometimes large statues of winged angels, female angels (often very sensually displayed), as well as winged child angels. These images of “angels” have been around for a long time, and many Christians purchase them and display them without knowledge of their true source or implications.

We need to note that the scriptures no where speak of angels such as are being depicted, so we wonder where does all this fascination with such ornaments come from? Much of this evidently has more to do with the graven images of winged gods and goddesses of the heathen religions than the Bible.

The exaltation of the supposed “innocence” of childhood is also a concept taken from heathen religions. The fallen human flesh often confuses adoration and worship of the creation with spirituality due to the emotionalism that is often attached with the carnal aspects of idolatry, which emotionalism is many times confused with “the spirit of God.” Today “New Age” paganism appears to be behind this increase of idolatry in this connection, for many Christians have not studied the Bible well enough to realize that these “angelic” works of men’s hands are actually idols.

Pagans often use the Bible to their advantage, so as to promote their pagan philosophies and idolatries, and many professed Christians seem to fall for their deceptions very easily.

While this is very fundamental, it raises some intresting issues. What do we as people regard as "angels" or "angelic" has a sort of mythology risen up around angels, that these women (and I to some extent) are using in our books but has nothing to do with the bible?

In my case I am going to make sure that my characters have more in common with birds, then with angels and make sure my story has more in common with Norse Myth then any biblical refrences.

Oriental Flirting Game

http://www.girlsgogames.co.uk/game/Oriental-Flirting-Game.html

Oh man I love this game just for the sheer cheek of it! Imagine running around beating boys into submission with your eye lazerz XD. I should try it out some time ;). Here's my little walkthrough for it.

1. Go right and lazer each guy you meet (if another girl sees you and does battle with you keep clicking your mouse until you win), when you get to the steps don't go up them go all the way left instead

2. Eye lazer every guy you meet including the fox mask guy, when he drops his mask put it on (I think this has implications for the western guy you try to win)

3. Go to the end and go into the graveyard

4. Wait (if you can) and see if the ghost boy appears, if he does laser him and his girlfriend's ghost will lock onto you.

5. Try to get into beauty mode after the ghost girlfriend is stalking you, if you do this then she will take away your beauty time (I know but don't worry) but in return she will be exoricsed meaning you won't have that fat -200,000 weighing on you at the end. (However even if you don't do this you will still get the best ending if you get the western guy)

6. Get the popular boy, it should be easy if you have high hearts

7. Go up the steps, ignore all the boys here you don't have time and run to where the two blonde haired characters are (I call this boy the western boy before)

8. When his girlfriend isn't looking, then eye laser him but when she turns around stop, when she turns away then laser him again until his heart is full.

9. You should have all men and the best ending :) enjoy!

Endings:

1. The plain litter-> you don't win any special boys
2. The plain litter with the silver pig-> you won the popular boy
3. The heavily decorated litter-> you got the popular boy and the ghost boy
4. The beautiful ship and the western boy fanning you-> you got all special boys and the western boy too :)

Inspiration

Work In Progress

Right now I am working on my novel and a short story named "The Virgin School".

The Soundtrack to my Life

The idea is to show songs you listened to or came to represent certain periods of your life:

Reject by a crush:


Argument with a friend over a guy:


Became distant with another very good friend:


First fell in love with Folk Music:


Left college:


Heartbroken again:


Having a great birthday at university:


Reached a period of utter depression:



Begin to heal from low self-esteem, laugh at stupid boys:


The anthem of our house, always makes me think of good times:

Talkin' about Angels.

A favorite angelic subject in art, matched only by Saint Gabriel, Saint Michael is often depicted as winged and with unsheathed sword. As with all angels' iconography, his wings represent swiftness, his sword means authority or power, and his white raiment stands for his enlightenment.[21] In the Renaissance period, he is shown as young, strong, and handsome, and is most often depicted as a proud, handsome angel in white or magnificent armor or a splendid coat of mail and equipped with sword, shield and spear. His wings are generally conspicuous and very grand. He is usually shown holding in his hand a banner or the scales of justice. Quite often he is seen, like Saint George and in some representations of the Madonna, in conflict with a dragon or standing upon a vanquished devil, who most of the time is Satan.

Huh, guess I was wrong about everyone lovin on Gabriel because he was the most shown in Art. Hmm, I really want to know why everyone loves him and yet Michael and the others get shunned.

Yeah just one thing here, I am talking about the sort of legendary angels... (argh, this is too hard to explain without sounding crazy, basically, for me angels are not this:



but this:



So here I am talking about the pretty legendary ones that don't for all intents and purposes exist anywhere but in the minds of manga writers/ye olde artists/romance novel writers (hell they could... but I don't think that's what it says in the Bible (yes I am a bad Xian, I need to put the bible on my ipod or summat so I can know more about my faith ._.) ). The real angels, the ones that are described in the Bible as looking more like the ones from Hellboy 2 I wouldn't even dream to talk about like this...

But yeah, why Gabriel? from the pictures Michael is just as hot. Oh well, what can one say? I guess Michael is too uppity for the ladies who write romance XD. Not to mention what the sects say about him, that he became Jesus or some such. (Ok, I shall
never understand Seventh Day Adventurists (Sorry it was too hard to resist) and Jehovah's Witnesses) In fact there's hardly any info at all about Gabriel on wiki, but what I assume happened is that Gabriel is the only angel everyone knows about because of the nativity, and people began to think of angels as pretty because of the art... intresting...

So then Romance writers came along and wanted their heroes to look like the pretty angels but couldn't remember anyone except Gabriel and so they used him. Also he's probably on more xmas cards than Michael... hmm. But the manga writers, they just like bishies with wings, which is what I like XD, hence the book.

Boys of Bedlam

My favoooourite song at the moment... ah English Folk Music, I am nothing without you!

Is my sickness passing?

Starting to feel better thank goodness, I will never take those strong kind of pills ever again, my doctor should not have given me medication that also treats Syphillis and prevents Malaria just for an eye infection!

Beginning to feel less light headed now, hopefully it will remain this way.

One day... will I have as many fans???

Right now I feel as if I am so small, staring up at giants, people that I admire and things that I wish I could be. Two people, I admire the most, they are not english people. One is chinese (hong kong), the other Japanese. I have never been a fan of anyone but them. I am a very picky person when it comes to people that I admire.
I am so cynical~

Only for these two, would I frequent their webpages and stalk them and only for these two would I ever go to something where I could see them and become *gasp* a fan and act like one and feel silly but be so totally enamoured!

I think that I would like to meet them when if I ever become famous and say, wow... when I was a young stuggling writer, I looked up to you and no one else. It is hard for people to win my approval but when they do I will be fiercely loyal to them. It is the same with books, I have hard time finding favourites. However manga and manwha, though not books have touched me very much over the past few years. So here is a list:

Favourite manga/manwha:

1) Tsuki no Shippo, why?: Tale of an innocent girl and a stiff cold guy who gradually learns to love, what's not to like. Also makes me laugh, the girl is very earnest, just like me! It is very cheerful, though not very intellectual and I read it when I am down.
2) Angel Myth, (may be subject to change, as I haven't read the end) Why?: I cannot tell the direction her story will take, she started her book as a normal shoujo and then completely went off the track! (are you allowed to do that?) she keeps veils in front of my eyes, nothing is as it seems and her world is intresting. Also, I am in love with gabriel! and the way she draws, it is beautiful... Gabriel's compassion for Hui Sheng comes through just in the way she draws him. I was so stunned...I kept that picture on my desktop for weeks...
I was so sure that she had stolen this story from somewhere, it was so good. I even looked up Paradise Lost to see if she had taken liberties... but no. I had to conceed to her... (and let my arrogant front down) she was a good writer >_< (AND I DO NOT SAY THIS ABOUT ANY BODY!!!)
3) Queen's Knight, Why: What's not to love? A young girl trapped in a medieval world, trying her hardest to make it a better place. She is not like other girls, she is active and kind and realises the mistake in falling in love with Rieno (it was refreshing to see a heroine, who put her work and her people before her love intrest). Love Rieno also however, dark and tormented, you can't understand him at first. Please kiss me forcefully too ~~~~~~
4) Operation Liberate Men, Why: gender, bender. That is all I have to say. A world where men are women and women are men. I am a student of gender studies and a believer in pulling away sterotypes, so I love this. LOVE LOVE LOVE!! Such a pity the author never finished. (EDIT: AAAaaaaHHHH! it just got licensed, BUY BUY BUY!)
5) Bara no tameni, Why: ugly girl as a main character, once again something I had not seen before. Taught me a lot about the world and loving myself and other people. Characters are so intresting and even thought it is not fantasy (my favourite genre) I was hooked by the drama of the family (and I hate soaps, so that is surprising)

Then in a world of it's own:

Beserk.... I can't tell you about this. When I watched it I thought, finally someone shows medieval times as it actually was, not romanticised. How did he know?
The sex scene between Charlotte and Griffith, just 0_0....
This anime shocked me, it made me feel. No sterotypes, I had no idea how things were going to turn out. Turned me on my head. I was in a state of shock for a week after the ending, acting like a zombie. Somehow... I don't know, I feel strangely connected to it, as if it was written by an english person who read all tales of knights and listened to the ballads and just turned it into something... something ( I do not even have words).... I.... well, it was like they took my mind and everything I knew and made something dark and twisted. My fairytales, my stories, my folk music... everything that I surround myself with daily and I was not angry but I welcomed the change from my own idealistic slant. The author is the cynical to my idealism.

Literature:

Far from the Madding Crowd, why: when I had a lot of problems, low self esteem and plagued by anxiety this book reached out to me. Though I feel a lot like the old farmer >_< this book showed me that people are often stupid and make mistakes but that I shouldn't expect so much from them, in the end I will find the Bathsheba to my Gabriel :D

The Secret Garden: Oh dear, I become very much attached to Mary when she was a spoiled brat in this book, I felt like she was the only heroine I could relate to at this time in my life. I love the gothicness of it and the story of Colin's parents, was so romantic, though tragic...

Sense and Sensibility: Ah I am such a Mari-Anne... There needs no more to be said...

Hmm, actually now I am feeling a little light headed from my pills...

If I think of anymore I will edit this post.

My heart...

Hello, I am in love!


No I have not found the man of my dreams, I am not in love with any earthly thing! Actually, this has not happened to me in so long, I almost gave up hope, thinking it belonged to the realm of my childhood but no... once more I was blessed!

By inspiration :D

I am in love with my story, I am in love with writing it and thinking it! I am in love with the very idea of it! At night it keeps me awake and often I fall into a day dream just thinking about it. I want to tell everyone I know about it! It makes me wriggle and a strange clenching feeling in my stomach ^^. I am excited just thinking about writing and after work I can't wait to get home to it!

Haa~~~

I am so happy!

Can you believe it? It did not come to me without help, I cannot deny that the beautiful illustations in Angel Myth did contribute to this feeling of euphoria! Nor that the inspiration I recieved from my research was not a factor! What I found was my zone, a sudden moment of clarity (if I was a Buddhist, I would call it enlightenment! But as a Christian I call it love!) I suddenly understood what my story wanted me to write and how to write it!

I am so glad!

No One Likes Michael

Still have my eye infection. One is all puffed up, like that guy in Angela's Ashes except not as tragic.

Recently I have found a good way to pass the time, while on holiday. I'm translating a Manwha, (or Chinese manga) using two online translators, bablefish and MDBG's Chinese-English Dictionary. MDBG is very good as it tells you the meaning of each character so that when I get a gibberish answer, which I do get, alot, I can look up the meaning and see if it fits. it's quite hard as I'm using a text from picture, program which guesses the characters from the scans of the manga. It often gets them wrong so I have to look up each character separately.

Actually even though it's quite hard and takes a long time, I'm having a blast. Like "I forgot to eat" kind of fun, really! Getting each character from the picture and then putting them into the translator, then trying to figure out what is going on, then editing the picture to put the english in. It's really fun! I'm also really getting into the story, because it takes me so long I have to really think about what the creator is trying to put across and I don't just skim read like I usually do. Every word is precious!

I'm doing this rather than looking for a scanlator because, no groups are currently doing it :( so I am left all alone, doing this manwha. Also this manwha is one of my favourites (the other being ushi no tane), you can probably tell which one i'm talking about from a previous post :S.

Oh yeah, about the header. Right now i'm writing a book about angelic beings (I think it's going well, last chapter I wrote wasn't so good, gonna edit it for about three days until i'm happy *sigh*) so i'm reading a lot of romance books with angels in. Including Sharon Shinn's books, A pocketfull of paradise by Kathleen Kale and Fallen by someone else.

I love Sharon Shinn's books, her world building is wonderful. In the last book I read Angelica, I could have sworn she was writing from real life, it seemed to real to me. If she hasn't spent time as part of a nomad commune than she is one heck of a writer! I like her angels too, though they aren't the pretty, blonde haired versions I so love (they wear leather 0_0) but they are cool. In terms of the romance I prefered, Gabriel and Rachel to Susanna and Gaaron and all in all, I prefered Archangel to Angelica. Angelica was longer but I felt it was just Archangel rewritten, she uses the same character types. Now comes the things I don't like, she's strong on her main characters but really weak on her supporting characters. There was one part in Angelica where the Eyrie (where all the angels live) gets well, sort of bombed and I was... happy... I didn't like any of the supporting characters, they felt so wooden! However this is a problem I have myself.

Me and Sharon, we have the same kind of writing style. We just sit down and write and don't plan. So often our scenes and characters are rather chaotic. This is something I am really trying to change! it was one of the reasons I gave up on QOWE after FOUR YEARS (it still upsets me). Also her characters are... very promisicious. Being not promisicious (i'm one step away from being a nun, no joking. However I am no prude, why do you think I read romance novels, if not for the hot, wet action?) I find it hard to relate.

Anyway I want you to keep track: her main hero was called: Gabriel (even Gaaron, he was basically Gabriel Aaron ((they might as well have been the same character for all I know )) it was just shortened)

Now Pocketful of Paradise. That was quite good, I enjoyed it. Ms Kale is a very good writer, she is balanced over her entire book. I never felt unlike with Sharon, that characters weren't well rounded. I liked the main character though she was a little flat, I like her son, he was cute, I liked the main character though I can't have liked him that much as I don't remember his name. The probably was, there was this nice story about people on a farm and them wham, bam, really steamy sex scene! I get more and more shocked by romances haha XD. But yeah it just felt like I walked in on my neighbours bonking, I kinda didn't want to know. Also there was a very distressing lack of wings considered he was turned into a human for a while. Curses... :(.

The last book, I should have been better but I bought it based purely on the cover! oh shallow me. I do regret it now. This book was BOOOOring! Do you ever get so bored that you head goes numb? you keep reading but your mind is just not there? this was how it was with this book. It may have been because there was just TWO characters in the whole book! two! the hero and heroine and everyone else just got like one scene! and they spend their time in an apartment and that's all they do! However I did enjoy one scene, it's where the hero realises that every woman will fall madly in love with him (and I mean madly) and he hates it, coz he doesn't love them back and stuff so it drives them crazy (psychotic crazy) and there's one part where he sinks so low as to get it on with a gutter rat, thinking even she couldn't love him but she does. This scene was really good! you didn't expect the toothless old girl to love him but she did. (BTW i would have loved this story if it had been about him and the ugly urchin)

This book also falls into the "i'm watching my neighbor" category. The hero and heroine can't have sex because then she would go ape-shit crazy in love with him, so he plays the piano and she masturbates in front of him (no kidding) then, in a scene probably inspired by pretty woman, he gets her on the piano and sticks his tongue... in... her... and I was just like 0_0...ok???
Then later, I am not kidding, they do some bondage, without the bondage. He can't touch her, coz he's afraid and all that jazz, so she just impales herself on him and he just has to lie there and take it.
And I was looking at the really sweet looking woman on the back of the book and going "You've done bondage haven't you! haven't you!" all Apu like.
It was just like, i've seen you walking around, talking, dancing, eating and now PORN. And people say Sex and the City is bad!!

Also one last thing about this book, rehab romance anyone? (type Romance covers into google and click on Longaman or whatever his name is, romance covers) both the hero and heroine are the equivilent of crack whores and for some reason, she thinks him being irrestible is a good thing. I was just like, you're gonna end up a crazy bitch like the rest of them.

Oh and also, this guy: Gabriel (but apprently not the annuciation one, I BET HE IS PISSED! imagine that though, "Gabriel you get to go and tell Mary she is pregnant with the Messiah" "who me?" "oh...no, not you, the OTHER gabriel")

Also in Angel Myth, Hui Sheng's guardian angel is Gabriel too. Everyone loves Gabriel, they really do.

Me, I like Michael. I do, I think he's cool. Michael is the leader, he's the guy who cast Lucifer into hell (I think, haven't read me paradise lost much) but he's not a hero in any of these books :(. It's always Gabriel, I wonder why. I guess he's the nicestest one and he gets the most art drawn about him.

So yeah, there you go. I'm signing off now. See ya.

Guh

Sorry about the Caps in the last post, I have an eye infection and it makes me want to write everything in Caps. Not to mention I can't write and that pisses me off.

Okies Bye.

Episode 1: In which I shit all over someones hard work for no good reason

Hello, as you can probably tell I'm a snob, a terrible, literary snob, because I have never published something of my own and therefore don't know the sour bitter taste of criticism it gives me free rein to tear apart someone elses work with my bare ragged teeeth!!!

Today I shall be reviewing Hero, no not the artisy chinese film, but the WEBCOMIC, the awesome WEBCOMIC OF WONDER AND VERY MUCH LOOKING LIKE A CERTAIN JAPANESE ARTIST'S WORK THAT BEGINS WITH A. If you wish to peruse the fangirl goodness of probably will end up with a yaoi couple which is why most people read this anyway, then here it is:

http://invisiblecities.comicgenesis.com/story.html

It is written by a Malaysian artist and actually I like this comic, it's pretty, it's awesome, it's philosophical but it's boring. Oh so boring. I gave up already.

You see I have this problem, I hate poetry, GOD I HATE POETRY. Poetry that doesn't tell that story, is basically snazzy words set to a beat. I love a beat but some poets, IT'S JUST PRETTY WORDS WITH NO MEANING SET IN SOME SORT OF PATTERN and we are supposed to read something into it. I have this problem with a certain Ms. Plath, I really tried to understand her poetry really I did but to me, it was just pretty words. I'm ashamed to admit this, that I have no perchance for poetry. I should being a writer and self-proclaimed intelligent person but heck, if it's not Folk Songs or from that Anthology you get at GCSE, I don't want to know.

If someone isn't dying, being left at the altar, being betrayed, coming back from the dead, losing one's baby or bitterly rebuking someone. I don't want to know.

So with this comic, this is my problem. The way she writes. It's just so empty, it's meant to be so meaningful and AAaaaAAaaah surreal but eh... if you refer to people as "the witch" and "the priest" i'm going to assume it's a children's book. It's so simple and because of that, yes it's beautiful, but it's empty beauty. It reminded me of a Neil Gaiman book I have (do not get me started on him, seriously. I liked mirrormask but everything else...)

But then again I am pretty jealous, she touches on some beautiful things like, where is your real home and such but yeah. I want real characters with real flaws and real dialogue. It's just not for me.

Ballet II

I watched a short documentary on sky arts recently, about Marcia Haydee's sleeping beauty. What attracted me was the performance of the 'male' Carabosse. So strange to change a female villain into a male. I'm more familiar with the sleeping beauty of the disney versions, so it was an intresting change! remember maleficient? now think of her as a guy :D.

Right now my book focuses on gender and how we percieve it, so it was intresting to watch something where the gender of a traditional character was switched as it is in my own book. Characters as I portray them in the beginning turn out to be the complete opposite as the books progress, gender roles switch and change and I try to challenge what we assume about gender in our own society. I owe alot to my studies of Dr Kimmel's book, Gendering Society which I recommend if you want to expand your horizion on the concept of gender.

I couldn't find the original to show you, the first one I saw with Richard Craygun but this one from the Flander's ballet website isn't bad:

http://www.koninklijkballetvanvlaanderen.be/Site/video_en.htm

Sorry I couldn't embed, but I emplore you to follow the link.

Angel Myth

Haaaaaaa~ I'm a big fan of this manga (or whatever the Hong Kongize word equivelent is, oh OTAKU tell me!) Even though only the first chapter of the first book has been released in English :(. I hang out at the scanlation forum in an attempt to get them to scanlate more but apparently yadda yadda excuse excuse. I read the raws but I'm a little confused still on the story.

As far as I can tell, there's this girl, this guy who turns out to be Lucifer and her guardian angel Gabriel (everyone loves him for some reason... I blame the pre-raphaelite, though in a spout of hypocrisy I too was awed by Edward Burne-Jones's stained glass at that House I went to which I can't remember the name and was partly the inspiration for new book). Anyway turns out she's the re-incarnation of the angel of light (here the chapter in english ends) From the Raws I can see that, turns out that her previous life person had some sort of relationship with the big L. (They Kiss) Anyway turns out she gets attacked in a big white dress (I approve) then gets saved by someone, there's this other angel who was attacking her before but now is helping her. I really couldn't tell what was happening.

I don't think the story ends in the manga, as I heard somewhere that the author wrote several books around it. I found this manga many years back, when I was searching for angel art for a book I was writing about angels at the time, called Angelic Rising ( I was 14) and since I am writing about somewhat Angelic beings now (they have wings, that is it. My religion won't let me go further than that, it makes me uncomfortable) I wanted to re-visit this manga, I had saved some pictures in my old art folder when I first discovered anime and was amazed by it. Her artwork is the most beautiful of angels I've ever seen, just one look at her webpage sets my inspiration soaring.

Her is some cosplay of said stories, which also inspires me. (It's the bad yet awe inspiring dancing I think) what happens here, that I can't understand from looking at pretty pictures written with chinese characters confuses me. Why is Gabriel and the main character's little demon fighting? who is the angel the big L beats up while attempting to court the main character? I know the red haired one is Michael but I don't know the names of the others. Also where can I get a dress like that white one?? so NIIICE! I want to run around a castle in it and pretend i'm a Gothic Heroine! Ah well never mind!



Ha, I also stalk the author, I was shocked at her appearance, as I am at most authors. When I read their books, I get an image and they look nothing like that image! she goes to lots of cons in HK I think and has pretty hair which she curls. wonder if someone will write like this about me one day! here's hoping! I am a bit of a fan but ah but you'll never find out my true love ;D.

Writing is An ESSAY

Sorry about the last post, viewers of which I have just one but heck. (Maybe I can steal some from Got Medieval if I write GOOOOOOAAAAAAAAA!! in the comments, On another note I was completely ignored by Kate Beaton after pimping her on my facebook so much, when attempting to get her intrested in Horrible Histories. Maybe I should post on Got Medievial. Man am I off topic!) But I was tired and expect this blog to be full of badly written grammer and paragraphs as all my work goes on my novel, so fuck it if I write like a loony here.

Anyway I am trying to explain how writing a novel is not easy, it's basically writing an essay. It's easy to write as though you were talking, rattling off chapter after chapter but a really good book takes time. You need to plan out when certain things happen, when character x recognises emotion x etc. etc. (the last part is really important in my current book) I spent four days re-writing the last three small chapters until I was completely satisfied.
*GASP* have I become a perfectionist?

I must thank my Father for helping me out, with this. He who poked and poked me to re-write my essays until it was no longer an unfocused mess but a focused essay and hopefully my novel will also become focused.
Man I wish I was older, sometimes

(pros: People won't gasp when i tell them my real age, nicer menfolk (hopefully, or those thirty year old Thai men who became my good friends were just flukes), no more bitchy girls, not having to feel i'm inclined to go out drinking when I turn into an emotional poet after just one shot, can deal with sudden changes in moods better
Cons: having to get married and have children as society demands, getting wrinkles, having to work full time, feel like life is slipping away, parents getting older and get more bad natured)

Anyway I'm tired now, working is hard :( Bye BYES.

Writing, you're doing it wrong.

Now I'm no Holly Lisle, but I am most known on Deviantart for my witing tutorial which gets a favourite almost every other day (this isn't really something to be proud of -_-) but anyway, I do know writing, i've been doing it for 11 years, writing full length novels for six. Anyway today I was on a writers forum, oh horrors of horrors, what was I doing there? well I do hate writers forums but I realised I have a problem writing conversation scenes and was looking for some help. However what I stumbled across was a bunch of people discussing grammer and words that they hate. I mean come on, for me, grammer yes it's important but the average modern reader isn't really going to have a fit if I write grammer which has been amalgamated by modern day, I don't read a story for the grammer, I read it for the story and I write for the story.
You're missing the whole point, the emotional intensity of the characters is the most important for me, and no writing style is ever the "best" take lord of the rings for example.

So yeah, characters first, grammer second.

A New Beginning

My old novel is over unfortunately I gave up. I was too young when I first started it, my writing was full of teenageisms so now I am starting a new one :D sense the optimism. I'm using a lot of Norse Folklore in this one as well as old medieval english concepts. The Wheel of Fortune will feature heavily in this. It is called "The Hazards of Love" so far, from an Anne Briggs song and the title of a Decemberist's album (lol, I am still young right? haha). Right now it's hard to write, since the plot is still green but hopefully i'll soon be writing with the speed of lightening!!
Here are some songs that are inspiring me (that I can find :( Martin Carthy doesn't seem to be popular on the old UTUBE):



Argh The sound on this is terrible, she sounds like harpy. You should buy the proper song, just to hear how beautiful her voice really is!



I just like the video for this one:



I want to play this game. I played the second one, Silmeria which was good but not good enough. They are both beautifully made and feature strong heroines (er yeah, Alicia gets strong, I think XD). I think that in Silmeria, the game should have been about the Einherijar stories rather than Alicia's. Theres was so much more intresting. Kharon, as the evil pope shot through the heart on his inauguration day and Lylia and Lydia's stories are both two of my favourites. I want to be kidnapped from Crell Mont.! The history of the Rosetta dynasty and the battle of Camille Hill are so much more intresting that a trek to Yggdrasil. Just sayin'.

The Crusades

I am researching the Crusades at the moment in order to get some experience in warfare for my books. Of all the battles in history for me right now the Crusades are the most interesting. You have very clear cut "who is who", there were many of them and the men for fighting for a set goal. I am speaking from the Frankish side, which is where most of my research comes from as it has been translated into English and is easy to find online. Reading the chronicles is quite hard, considering I am revising at the same time. So I have been watching some documentaries on Youtube. Unfortunately they are all the documentaries I watched when I studied Medieval History at college. However this video is very cute! for crusades that is. It was written for a game but I think it sums up the Crusades also and has pretty cute diagrams.

Characters

I am in love with Cerys, she is amazing. She has been a character who has grown with me, she was with me during the worst times and she and I grew together. Reading back when I first began I see how much she changed over the book and how much she struggled. As someone who is often very sensitive about herself, it gives me confidence to see how wonderful she is and how there is no one else like her. When she first began she was so young she was like a child then she became a woman, a Queen. She struggled to find her voice just as I have struggled. She still has her problems and is still shy and wary of others but it is not a bad thing. She is unlike any other heroine I have read. I hope that this is a good thing.



Whereas Cerys is quite young and unsure of herself, the character of my next book, as soon as I finish my current novel will be much older. She will be very sure of herself. I have chosen the name Angelique for her and she is the opposite of Cerys, whereas Cerys was quiet, Angelique is loud. Whereas Cerys was demure, Angelique speaks her mind. Angelique is the supporter of the main character Rana, in fact she is his only support. She watches over him throughout the book and does all she can for him. However in one part of the book she will come into conflict with Rana, Angelique may be strong but in this scene she will be vulnerable. Angelique is an angry character and feels very strongly. But in this scene she will denounce love in all it's forms. She wishes to be independent and fears the idea of someone else being "half" of her, she never wants to be like those women. I think I will enjoy finding out about Angelique as I write her.
(Sorry CLAMP for using your image but I haven't commissioned an artist as yet ^-^)

Swan Lake

It's one of my life's dreams to see this ballet. Princess Tutu is a beautiful Japanese series and introduced me to the ballet *blush*. I love the interplay between dark and light. In the first video her triumph over the prince is stunning and so powerful. In some versions, the evil force behind the black swan dances with her, as see in the second video, lending her seduction his powers. Beautiful.



The second, a little less close but still as beautiful.

Tomorrow Is The Day

Reynadine

Her ruby lips and cherry cheeks, the lass of Firmadie, ^[4]

She fainted in my arms there, all on the mountains high,

When I had kissed her once or twice, she came to herself again,

And said kind Sir be civil and tell to me your name.

Go down in yonder forest, my castle there you'll find,

Well wrote in ancient history, my name is Rynadine:

Come all you pretty fair maids, a warning take by me,

Be sure you quit night walking, and shun bad company,

For if you don't you are sure to rue until the day you die

Beware of meeting Rynadine all on the mountains high.